There was a time when I couldn’t just be friends with boys. There was a time when doing and saying what I did and said wasn’t ok. You kiss up? You’re flirting. You refuse to kiss up? You’re a problem.
Sometimes, it seems this is a bigger problem for the girls than it is the boys. Here’s the truth:
I’m a female. I am a human-being. I realize this is frowned upon. You just can’t be both.
That’s the bullshit I fight against. No. I don’t want your job. No. I don’t want your man. No. I really don’t want anything but the right to exist. I may not act as expected. I may not be as expected. I may not live as expected. That’s your problem, not mine.
I have this immense inability to keep myself quiet. I have this immense inability to just simply accept my role as female and shut up. I realize my life would be far easier if I did, but who wants an easy life?
It’s hard. It’s hard to the point of wishing I was not born female. It’s hard to the point of having nothing.
It’s easy to say you don’t want anything from anyone. Harder yet, to live it. There were two roads diverged in the woods. I guess, I’ve chosen the one less traveled by.