Being on Stage

Before the unfortunate incident of my freshman year, I used to be in plays. I was in speech. I loved drama, speech, had a few leads in plays. I was pretty good! When I was 15, I won the first place for dramatic interp for my dramatic interp of “Agnes of God” even though some judges hated my wild hair and weird clothes.

I used to win acting awards. And when I went to college the first time, I majored in Theatre. It was wonderful. I met so many incredible people; all kinds of people. I enjoyed being on stage, putting on the make up and the costumes. I loved pretending to be someone else for a while. I once thought maybe I could make a career of it. Maybe not as a famous actress, but just theatre. Working with actors, set designers, theatre people.

Then, after the incident, I couldn’t stand to be on stage anymore. I couldn’t stand people looking at me anymore. I was paranoid and even though I tried, stage fright made it unbearable. And when I tried later, I had to self-medicate beforehand just to get through it. 

I’m thinking of trying it again. At least an audition. Maybe community theatre? I feel like I should try. That incident took so much away, I feel like I should try and give something back to myself. I used to love being on stage. 

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